...my journey through the valleys and over the mountains as i learn to live with the 'new' reality of losing xavier ian. this is a place i can jot down thoughts, feelings, and things i am learning through this journey of life.

if my dreams came true...

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

since the nightmare began...

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Thursday, March 15, 2012

march 15, 2012...

it's been quite a while since my last post.  i just don't feel like i have anything to say that is helpful or important.  i've been e-mailing my counselor a lot...like a LOT!  he even replies every so often.  i still feel like i'm on a roller coaster.  i think about xavier everyday, just like i think about my living children every day.  i've been doing expressive artwork.  i've been journaling some.  i've been working on my relationship with my husband.  i've been working a lot...a LOT!  i haven't been facebooking much, but i try to get on at least every couple of days and see what's going on.  i guess i'm just giving a boring update of my life.  not much to say. 

1 comment:

  1. Michelle, I don't think a day will go by that you don't think of Xavier. You know I am pregnant and if I were to lose the baby it would stick with me everyday for the rest of my life. We had a little scare when we learned that our baby has velamentous cord insertion (with not vasa previa) a dangerous situation that I dwelled on for about a week. I didn't even feel like buying or looking at baby stuff because I felt like if something happened I wouldn't be able to handle it. I had to look hard at my faith and convince myself that it is in God's hands. I don't know if you know, but I suffer from depression and it's the times that I don't have a lot to say that I think I am feeling my best. I think you are on a upswing :) I enjoyed your boring update :)